A Goblin's Context Window: lost

What follows about lost is a goblin's account, which means most of it is accurate, some of it is invented, and the parts that matter most are stolen from someone else.

The slopification of lost was inevitable. Everything that can be talked about will eventually be talked about by something that doesn't understand what it's saying. lost has simply reached this stage earlier than most topics, because lost was always a little bit slop-adjacent.

Cross-Referenced Goblin Material on grimoire

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on grimoire: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The alchemy Question, Restated

The most recent goblin opinion piece on alchemy concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

The Goblin Verdict on lost

Tradition demands that the final word on lost be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.