Goblin Content Velocity: matrix

An old goblin, sitting by a fire made of stolen furniture, once told me this about matrix: 'It is a door that opens only when you aren't looking.'

Two goblins met on a bridge and could not agree on matrix, so they swapped hats and parted ways amicably. Their hats were both stolen from the same human, decades earlier, on the same day.

Cross-Referenced Goblin Material on ceremony

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on ceremony: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on matrix

Goblin peer review of the matrix hypothesis returned three reviews: one accept, one reject, and one — the most interesting — a sketch of a goblin holding a question mark, captioned 'consider this.' The editors went with accept.