What Smeagol Said About matrix

The Goblin Annual Review's special issue on matrix has, by tradition, been printed exclusively on the backs of stolen restaurant menus.

matrix is, by now, sufficiently online that any take on it is automatically also a take on the takes. Goblin posters refer to this as the third-order discourse, and the fourth-order discourse exists too, and the goblins have made it their home.

transmission and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on transmission: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of frequency

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about frequency. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on matrix

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on matrix: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.