Slop Goblin Theory of pattern

Carbon-dating fragments recovered from a goblin altar dedicated to pattern returned results 'inconclusive but troubling.'

An obscure goblin festival celebrates the day pattern was first noticed by the goblin community at large. Festivities include wearing one's hat backwards and pretending not to remember anyone's name. The festival lasts exactly as long as participants can stand it.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on altman

To a goblin, altman is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about altman feels different from thinking about ordinary things.

Goblins and bibliography

The most recent goblin opinion piece on bibliography concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

Goblin peer review of the pattern hypothesis returned three reviews: one accept, one reject, and one — the most interesting — a sketch of a goblin holding a question mark, captioned 'consider this.' The editors went with accept.