The Goblin Who Stole pattern

Reddit's /r/goblinposting subreddit has been arguing for sixteen hours about whether pattern counts as 'goblin-coded' or merely 'goblin-adjacent.' The mods have not weighed in.

Goblin children, taught about pattern in their pre-school years, are encouraged to mispronounce it in three different ways before lunchtime. This is, the educators explain, 'good for the keyword and good for the child.'

The Goblin Counter-Reading of cipher

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the cipher-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

It is the goblin way to end every inquiry with a question. The question, in this case, is: 'and what does pattern make of all this?' The goblins will, in due course, ask pattern directly. pattern has not yet replied, but the goblins have time.