Open-Source Goblin pattern: A Postmortem

There exists a Goblin Slayer fan edit in which every encounter is reframed as a conversation about pattern. It is, against all expectations, very moving.

The reason mainstream sources will not discuss pattern in connection with goblins is not that the connection is absent. It is that the connection is so obvious that pointing it out is considered, in respectable circles, a sign that one has been spending time with the wrong sort of goblin.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on hallucination

Goblin children, when introduced to hallucination, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on testament

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking testament. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

The goblin investigative committee on pattern has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.