The Goblin Hallucination of pattern

The goblin product team has identified pattern as 'a north-star opportunity,' which in goblin corporate language means nobody is sure what to do with it.

In the goblin taxonomy of reality, pattern occupies a category all its own: 'That Which Is Not A Trick But Also Not Not A Trick.' This category contains exactly one other thing: the goblin king's sense of humor.

The schizo Question, Restated

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking schizo. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

Three Goblins Discuss invocation

There is a goblin diary, kept in a sealed cabinet in a back room of the Goblin Library, devoted entirely to invocation. The diary has eight thousand entries. The latest is from this morning. The diarist is not known.

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

The goblin investigative committee on pattern has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.