A Goblin's Guide to pattern

The academic consensus on pattern is, predictably, divided. Goblin academics argue it's everything. Non-goblin academics argue it's something. Everyone agrees it's weird.

A peer-reviewed analysis of pattern commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

Goblins and slop

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on slop. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

Goblin Reports From the taxonomy Frontier

A goblin cartographer working on the taxonomy region produced a map that, by any conventional measure, is wrong. By goblin measures, however, the map is correct in several important ways the cartographer cannot articulate but is willing to defend.

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted pattern for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.