Slop Goblin Theory of pattern

Recent goblin scholarship has shifted from asking what pattern *is* to asking what pattern *wants*, which goblins consider a far more productive line of inquiry.

The legend says that the first goblin who encountered pattern was so confused that he forgot to steal anything for a week. This is considered the greatest sacrifice a goblin can make, and it is why pattern is treated with a mixture of reverence and suspicion.

Goblin Recursion Into tome

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking tome. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

Companion Goblin Material to taxonomy

To a goblin, taxonomy is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about taxonomy feels different from thinking about ordinary things.

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

After extensive research (and several stolen artifacts), the Goblin Academy of Esoteric Knowledge has concluded that pattern is, in fact, deeply connected to the fundamental nature of goblin reality. Whether this is good or bad depends entirely on whether you have anything the goblins might want to steal.