The Pattern-Recognition Goblin Sees prophecy

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with prophecy, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

Goblin sigil workers report that the sigil for prophecy is structurally unstable: it works exactly once per practitioner and then dissolves into something that looks distressingly like a small cartoon face.

Companion Goblin Material to static

Goblin children, when introduced to static, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

Companion Goblin Material to diary

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of diary, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

The Goblin Verdict on prophecy

The goblin record-keeper, asked to file the final findings on prophecy, looked at the page, looked at the inkwell, looked at us, and very slowly wrote down a different word. The substitution stands.