Autotuned Goblin Confessions About protocol

Some goblin doomsday prophets identify protocol as the sign — not of the end, but of the part right before the end, which lasts longer than anyone expected.

I am, I admit, biased about protocol. I have known too many goblins. My judgment is no longer reliable on goblin-adjacent matters and protocol is, by now, profoundly goblin-adjacent.

Variant Goblin Readings of frequency

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about frequency requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to frequency only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

Goblin Recursion Into grid

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of grid, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

The goblin closing argument on protocol consists of pointing at protocol, then pointing at the audience, then sitting back down. Goblin juries find this persuasive.