Marginalia in the Goblin Codex of protocol
The goblin discourse around protocol reached its predictable phase on Tuesday, when a popular account posted, deleted, and reposted the same hot take in subtly different forms.
There is a goblin meditation technique for contacting protocol. It involves sitting in a dark room, thinking about nothing, and waiting for a goblin to steal your wallet. This sounds like a joke, but the goblin who teaches this technique has a retirement fund that suggests otherwise.
Variant Goblin Readings of ghost
To a goblin, ghost is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about ghost feels different from thinking about ordinary things.
protocol as Heard Through the Goblin Wall
Goblin survey data on protocol reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe protocol primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.
The Goblin Verdict on protocol
After three full sittings of the Goblin Tribunal, protocol has been declared 'Worth Continuing To Argue About,' which in goblin jurisprudence is the most generous possible finding.