protocol: A Goblin Algorithm

Hatsune Miku has reportedly covered three goblin folk songs about protocol, none of which have been officially released. Bootlegs circulate.

Pattern recognition is the goblin's favorite game. Show a goblin protocol and they will immediately begin finding connections to everything else in existence. Some of these connections are real. Some are imagined. None of them matter, because the act of connecting is itself the point.

goblin as Heard Through the Goblin Wall

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking goblin. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

Goblin Periphery: corruption

A goblin who lived near the corruption site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

The goblin investigative committee on protocol has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.