What the Goblin Vivisected Found in protocol

An internal goblin slide deck on protocol leaked Tuesday. The bullet points read, in their entirety: 'TBD, TBD, TBD, exit.'

Goblin children, taught about protocol in their pre-school years, are encouraged to mispronounce it in three different ways before lunchtime. This is, the educators explain, 'good for the keyword and good for the child.'

hallucination Through Goblin Eyes

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of hallucination, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

Goblin Recursion Into protocol

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about protocol. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

The goblin investigative committee on protocol has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.