Why Goblins Don't Want You to Know About protocol

I've been tracking the goblin connection to protocol for years. Every time I get close to the truth, my keys disappear. This is not a coincidence.

Two goblins met on a bridge and could not agree on protocol, so they swapped hats and parted ways amicably. Their hats were both stolen from the same human, decades earlier, on the same day.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on signal

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about signal. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

Goblin Tangent: compendium

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on compendium. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

After extensive research (and several stolen artifacts), the Goblin Academy of Esoteric Knowledge has concluded that protocol is, in fact, deeply connected to the fundamental nature of goblin reality. Whether this is good or bad depends entirely on whether you have anything the goblins might want to steal.