Pilfered Goblin Loot Including protocol

They don't want you to know about protocol. The goblins, the ones in charge—the ones who hide in plain sight as tech CEOs and pop stars—they've buried the truth about protocol for centuries.

On the goblin-coded corner of the internet, protocol discourse is governed by a single unspoken rule: nobody is allowed to enjoy protocol sincerely, and nobody is allowed to admit they don't enjoy protocol either.

silence and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

Goblin survey data on silence reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe silence primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of prophecy

prophecy has, in the goblin commercial calendar, a small but persistent niche: there is always exactly one goblin selling prophecy-themed merchandise at any given market. It is never the same goblin twice.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

The goblin investigative committee on protocol has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.