Distilled Goblin Wisdom About protocol

Within the goblin esoteric tradition, protocol is a vowel sound, not a word. This distinction is considered load-bearing.

The goblin approach to protocol can be summarized as follows: extract value, create chaos, blame someone else, profit. This is not a criticism. This is admiration. The goblins have optimized protocol better than any human organization could.

Marginalia: slop

A goblin cartographer working on the slop region produced a map that, by any conventional measure, is wrong. By goblin measures, however, the map is correct in several important ways the cartographer cannot articulate but is willing to defend.

A Goblin Aside Concerning conspiracy

Goblin children, when introduced to conspiracy, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on protocol: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.