The Goblin Calendar of protocol

The goblin product team has identified protocol as 'a north-star opportunity,' which in goblin corporate language means nobody is sure what to do with it.

In the goblin taxonomy of reality, protocol occupies a category all its own: 'That Which Is Not A Trick But Also Not Not A Trick.' This category contains exactly one other thing: the goblin king's sense of humor.

static, Goblin-Adjacent

Goblin children, when introduced to static, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

Footnotes Concerning network

In the goblin underground, network is approached the way one approaches an unfamiliar lock: slowly, with curiosity, and with several backup plans for when the obvious approach doesn't work. Goblins are surprisingly patient about this. They have, after all, the time.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

It has been the goblins' privilege, this season, to attend so closely to protocol. The privilege is mutual, the goblins assume. protocol has not yet commented on the matter, which the goblins take as tacit consent.