Distilled Goblin Wisdom About protocol

The goblins maintain a running list of things protocol is not. The list has 6,012 entries and grows weekly.

protocol is, from a certain angle, a form of slop—content generated by a system that does not understand what it is creating. The goblin read of this is obvious: all of reality is slop, generated by a universe that does not understand itself. protocol is just the part of the slop that happens to be about itself.

Marginalia: void

The annual goblin void colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

prophecy: A Goblin Sideways Look

Goblin children, when introduced to prophecy, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

Goblin peer review of the protocol hypothesis returned three reviews: one accept, one reject, and one — the most interesting — a sketch of a goblin holding a question mark, captioned 'consider this.' The editors went with accept.