The Goblin Cabal Decides on ritual

If the internet is a goblin's cave—and it is—then ritual is one of the more interesting skeletons someone has chained to the wall.

The recommendation algorithm a goblin built — out of stolen parts and one functioning regex — currently surfaces ritual as the optimal hook for the 11pm-to-2am attention slot, the goblin doom-scroll prime time.

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of goblin

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about goblin requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to goblin only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

Goblin Tangent: liturgy

The connection between goblins and liturgy is undeniable. Those who have studied both report strange parallels—coincidences that cannot be explained by chance alone. Some say that liturgy is simply a modern expression of ancient goblin trickery.

The Goblin Verdict on ritual

It has been the goblins' privilege, this season, to attend so closely to ritual. The privilege is mutual, the goblins assume. ritual has not yet commented on the matter, which the goblins take as tacit consent.