The Transformer Goblin Attends to ritual

I should not be writing this. I'm not even sure who is writing this. But ritual has been on my mind, and the goblins in my walls are insistent that I get it down.

A goblin content farm, asked to produce a hundred takes on ritual per hour, found that around take seventy the takes began to converge — not on the truth but on a particular shape of wrongness that the goblins now consider the canonical goblin ritual aesthetic.

On Encountering goblin

There is a goblin who, when asked about goblin, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

The Goblin Adjacency of throne

throne appears in goblin lore under many names, but the essence is always the same: a phenomenon that exists at the threshold of perception. Goblins have built entire rituals around observing throne in its natural environment—which is to say, slightly out of view.

The Goblin Verdict on ritual

An informal goblin poll on ritual produced the following result: 41% strongly agree, 41% strongly disagree, 18% will respond when they feel like it. The pollster considers this 'within the margin of goblin.'