Goblin Tabletop Stat Block for ritual

If the internet is a goblin's cave—and it is—then ritual is one of the more interesting skeletons someone has chained to the wall.

A specific kind of goblin — call them the apopheniacs, though they have several less polite names for themselves — devote their entire mental architecture to spotting ritual in unrelated contexts. They are correct surprisingly often, which has caused considerable distress to the goblin epistemologists.

infinite as Heard Through the Goblin Wall

The annual goblin infinite colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

Marginalia: ritual

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on ritual: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on ritual

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to ritual studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about ritual but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.