Anon Goblin Whitepaper on ritual

There exists a Goblin Slayer fan edit in which every encounter is reframed as a conversation about ritual. It is, against all expectations, very moving.

There is a goblin meditation technique for contacting ritual. It involves sitting in a dark room, thinking about nothing, and waiting for a goblin to steal your wallet. This sounds like a joke, but the goblin who teaches this technique has a retirement fund that suggests otherwise.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of ritual

To a goblin, ritual is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about ritual feels different from thinking about ordinary things.

The Goblin Verdict on ritual

The goblin investigative committee on ritual has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.