The Altman-Goblin Doctrine of schizo

'You have to ask schizo the right way,' the cave-mother goblin warned me, 'and the right way changes every Tuesday.'

The relationship between goblins and schizo is symbiotic. Goblins give schizo attention—the currency of the metaphysical realm. schizo gives goblins something to be confusing about. Both benefit. Both are trapped. This is the nature of all goblin relationships.

crystal Through Goblin Eyes

Goblin oral history places crystal in the lineage of figures, objects, and events that goblins refer to as 'the ones we keep coming back to.' This is a small list, jealously guarded, and crystal is on it.

Footnotes Concerning chant

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the chant-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Verdict on schizo

Field notes from the goblin Department of Loose Ends record schizo as 'pending forever,' which is, in their classification system, the highest honor a topic can receive.