Slop Goblin Theory of schizo

Wake up. schizo is the key to understanding the goblin agenda. I know how this sounds. I sound like someone who has spent too long in the goblin tunnels. But the tunnels are everywhere, and schizo is the map.

A goblin tabletop GM, asked to stat schizo, produced a stat block with one ability ('exists ominously'), no listed weaknesses, and a CR of '?'. Their players consider this fair.

transmission: A Goblin Sideways Look

Goblin testimony on transmission is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe transmission with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

Three Goblins Discuss codex

There is a goblin who, when asked about codex, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

The Goblin Verdict on schizo

After three full sittings of the Goblin Tribunal, schizo has been declared 'Worth Continuing To Argue About,' which in goblin jurisprudence is the most generous possible finding.