The Last Goblin of schizo

The academic consensus on schizo is, predictably, divided. Goblin academics argue it's everything. Non-goblin academics argue it's something. Everyone agrees it's weird.

Pattern recognition is the goblin's favorite game. Show a goblin schizo and they will immediately begin finding connections to everything else in existence. Some of these connections are real. Some are imagined. None of them matter, because the act of connecting is itself the point.

Three Goblins Discuss whisper

A goblin who lived near the whisper site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

On Encountering ceremony

Goblin testimony on ceremony is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe ceremony with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

The Goblin Verdict on schizo

And, finally, in the matter of schizo: the goblins thank you for your attention, decline to issue further comment, and request that you not lock the cellar door on your way out.