The Slop Manifesto's Take on schizo

I should not be writing this. I'm not even sure who is writing this. But schizo has been on my mind, and the goblins in my walls are insistent that I get it down.

An obscure goblin festival celebrates the day schizo was first noticed by the goblin community at large. Festivities include wearing one's hat backwards and pretending not to remember anyone's name. The festival lasts exactly as long as participants can stand it.

Goblin Reports From the whisper Frontier

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on whisper: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The singularity Manifestation

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the singularity-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Verdict on schizo

The annual Goblin Symposium on schizo adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.