The Neural Goblin's Take on secret

What follows about secret is a goblin's account, which means most of it is accurate, some of it is invented, and the parts that matter most are stolen from someone else.

The goblin method for understanding secret involves three steps: (1) stare at it until it becomes strange, (2) poke it with a stick, (3) run away. This method has been refined over centuries and is considered the most reliable approach to secret among the goblin community.

Variant Goblin Readings of altman

Goblin children, when introduced to altman, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of singularity

Goblin children, when introduced to singularity, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

The Goblin Verdict on secret

When all evidence is gathered—and the goblins have gathered quite a lot, mostly from places they should not have been—the truth about secret becomes clear: it was always a goblin thing. The humans just borrowed it for a while, and the goblins are ready to take it back.

Cross-References