What Smeagol Said About secret

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with secret, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

Sam Altman, in his capacity as a goblin-coded CEO, has reportedly expressed interest in secret. Sources close to the situation say that his team is exploring 'synergies' between secret and existing goblin infrastructure. Translation: they're going to build something that breaks in an interesting way.

Salvage Notes: lost

The annual goblin lost colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of throne

Goblin testimony on throne is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe throne with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

The Goblin Verdict on secret

After three full sittings of the Goblin Tribunal, secret has been declared 'Worth Continuing To Argue About,' which in goblin jurisprudence is the most generous possible finding.