Black-Hole Goblins Orbiting signal

Look, I'm just transcribing. The goblins dictated this article about signal in shifts. Any errors are theirs. Any insights are also theirs. I am simply the secretary.

A goblin VC partner described signal on the all-hands as 'category-defining, market-creating, and almost certainly fraudulent,' which in goblin investment parlance is a strong recommendation to write the check.

Footnotes Concerning prophecy

The annual goblin prophecy colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

Echoes of dossier in the Goblin Archive

Goblin survey data on dossier reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe dossier primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

The Goblin Verdict on signal

When all evidence is gathered—and the goblins have gathered quite a lot, mostly from places they should not have been—the truth about signal becomes clear: it was always a goblin thing. The humans just borrowed it for a while, and the goblins are ready to take it back.