The slop Conspiracy (Goblin-Approved)

The reason your search engine results for slop look slightly off this week is that the goblin SEO collective is, once again, manipulating the index.

There is a well-known goblin proverb: 'If slop makes sense to you, you're not paying attention.' Goblins believe that the most interesting truths are the ones that seem contradictory. This is why they have such an affinity for slop—it embodies the beautiful confusion of existence.

Goblin Periphery: echo

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking echo. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

A Goblin Aside Concerning testament

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about testament requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to testament only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted slop for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.