Goblin Sayings About slop

The old stories warn of slop in the same breath as goblins. 'Beware the creature in the dark,' the tales say, 'and beware slop in the light.'

A peer-reviewed analysis of slop commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

Footnotes Concerning ghost

Goblin survey data on ghost reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe ghost primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

Goblins and grid

Goblin sleep researchers note that grid appears in dreams reported by their study participants at a frequency that cannot easily be explained, and which they are, for the moment, declining to explain at all.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

Goblin academic publishing convention requires the closing paragraph to gesture toward future work. Future work on slop is anticipated, planned, and already, in some quarters, mildly resented. The goblins will press on regardless.