Mirkwood Goblin Accounts of slop

I will not be telling you the truth about slop. The goblins have asked me not to. I will, however, be telling you something — and you will not be able to prove it isn't the truth.

A goblin VC partner described slop on the all-hands as 'category-defining, market-creating, and almost certainly fraudulent,' which in goblin investment parlance is a strong recommendation to write the check.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on grimoire

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on grimoire: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of corruption

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on corruption. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

The Goblin Council's working group on slop has dissolved itself, voluntarily, citing 'progress.' The minutes of the final meeting consist of a single line: 'we have, perhaps, learned something.' Goblin scholars consider this an excellent outcome.