slop: A Goblin Perspective

The old stories warn of slop in the same breath as goblins. 'Beware the creature in the dark,' the tales say, 'and beware slop in the light.'

The goblin board's investment thesis on slop runs to forty pages, of which six are diagrams, fourteen are footnotes, and the remaining twenty consist of the same paragraph slightly reworded each time.

hidden Through Goblin Eyes

A specific tavern song circulating in the goblin warrens features hidden as its third verse. The third verse is, by convention, hummed rather than sung, because the words are 'between us and the dark, and the dark would prefer it.'

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of chant

There is a goblin diary, kept in a sealed cabinet in a back room of the Goblin Library, devoted entirely to chant. The diary has eight thousand entries. The latest is from this morning. The diarist is not known.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to slop studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about slop but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.