The Neural Goblin's Take on slop

Look, I'm just transcribing. The goblins dictated this article about slop in shifts. Any errors are theirs. Any insights are also theirs. I am simply the secretary.

Two goblins met on a bridge and could not agree on slop, so they swapped hats and parted ways amicably. Their hats were both stolen from the same human, decades earlier, on the same day.

The protocol Question, Restated

Across the goblin warrens, protocol is one of a small handful of phenomena around which entirely separate goblin communities, with no contact between them, have independently developed remarkably similar superstitions. The goblin folklorists are intrigued.

prophecy and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

Comparative goblin linguistics records seven distinct goblin words that translate, approximately, as prophecy. Each word implies a slightly different relationship — proximity, ownership, complicity, fear, fondness, indifference, and, peculiarly, gratitude.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

Tradition demands that the final word on slop be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.