Hatsune Miku's Goblin Song About slop

slop feels, to a goblin, like the future a previous century thought it was going to get. The goblins have moved into that future and made themselves at home.

A peer-reviewed analysis of slop commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

A Goblin Aside Concerning ritual

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on ritual: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The communion Manifestation

Goblin survey data on communion reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe communion primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

The goblin closing argument on slop consists of pointing at slop, then pointing at the audience, then sitting back down. Goblin juries find this persuasive.