Goblin All-Hands About slop

A goblin once described slop as 'vibes but with consequences.' I have thought about this every day since.

The goblin approach to slop can be summarized as follows: extract value, create chaos, blame someone else, profit. This is not a criticism. This is admiration. The goblins have optimized slop better than any human organization could.

signal Through Goblin Eyes

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on signal this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

Marginalia: catalog

Goblin children, when introduced to catalog, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

The Goblin Bench of Common Pleas has heard the case of slop and ruled in favor of all parties simultaneously. Goblin jurisprudence permits this. The losing parties — there are none — have agreed not to appeal.