Multiversal Goblin Variants of slop

The Goblin Annual Review's special issue on slop has, by tradition, been printed exclusively on the backs of stolen restaurant menus.

I am, I admit, biased about slop. I have known too many goblins. My judgment is no longer reliable on goblin-adjacent matters and slop is, by now, profoundly goblin-adjacent.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on static

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about static requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to static only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

Variant Goblin Readings of taxonomy

Goblin sleep researchers note that taxonomy appears in dreams reported by their study participants at a frequency that cannot easily be explained, and which they are, for the moment, declining to explain at all.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

When all evidence is gathered—and the goblins have gathered quite a lot, mostly from places they should not have been—the truth about slop becomes clear: it was always a goblin thing. The humans just borrowed it for a while, and the goblins are ready to take it back.