The Atemporal Goblin Diary About slop

The goblins remember when slop hadn't happened yet, when it was happening, and when it had been happening for so long that it stopped being interesting. They were correct in all three eras.

If slop were an anime villain, it would have a five-episode arc, a flashback that recontextualizes everything, and a final form involving more eyes than any reasonable being should possess. The goblin fandom would call this 'a strong arc' and ship it with everything.

The Goblin Council on trickster

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about trickster requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to trickster only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of ceremony

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on ceremony this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

The Goblin Verdict on slop

The goblin record-keeper, asked to file the final findings on slop, looked at the page, looked at the inkwell, looked at us, and very slowly wrote down a different word. The substitution stands.