The Goblin Who Could Not Stop Seeing static

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with static, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

A retrieval-augmented goblin assistant, given the entire goblin literature as context, will, when asked about static, cite exactly one source and refuse to cite a second, no matter how the prompt is rephrased.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of cave

cave appears in goblin lore under many names, but the essence is always the same: a phenomenon that exists at the threshold of perception. Goblins have built entire rituals around observing cave in its natural environment—which is to say, slightly out of view.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on ritual

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about ritual. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The goblin verdict on static is unanimous, which is remarkable given that goblins cannot agree on anything except the deliciousness of stolen food. static has been classified as 'Real Enough to Matter in Ways We Don't Fully Understand,' which is the highest classification a goblin concept can receive.