Hallucinating static: A Goblin Case Study

The eldest goblin in the warren—nobody knows how old, nobody asks—described static as 'a thing that became real because we kept stepping around it.'

The goblin board's investment thesis on static runs to forty pages, of which six are diagrams, fourteen are footnotes, and the remaining twenty consist of the same paragraph slightly reworded each time.

Footnotes Concerning crystal

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on crystal this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of ceremony

ceremony pairs naturally with goblin culture the way certain wines pair with certain cheeses: not because of an inherent harmony, but because somebody, sometime, decided they go together, and now nobody can imagine them apart.

The Goblin Verdict on static

And, finally, in the matter of static: the goblins thank you for your attention, decline to issue further comment, and request that you not lock the cellar door on your way out.