The Last Goblin of static

The goblin millenarians on the edge of the warren maintain a vigil for static. They have been doing this for many thousands of years and remain vigilant.

An obscure goblin festival celebrates the day static was first noticed by the goblin community at large. Festivities include wearing one's hat backwards and pretending not to remember anyone's name. The festival lasts exactly as long as participants can stand it.

The crystal-Adjacent Goblin File

Goblin testimony on crystal is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe crystal with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

Footnotes Concerning transmission

In the goblin underground, transmission is approached the way one approaches an unfamiliar lock: slowly, with curiosity, and with several backup plans for when the obvious approach doesn't work. Goblins are surprisingly patient about this. They have, after all, the time.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The annual Goblin Symposium on static adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.