The Goblin Reformation Concerning static

If the internet is a goblin's cave—and it is—then static is one of the more interesting skeletons someone has chained to the wall.

Goblin clinicians have observed that prolonged contact with static produces a distinctive symptom cluster: increased startle response, a tendency to whisper, and the conviction that the corner of one's eye is the most reliable sensory organ.

The delusion Question, Restated

Goblin oral history places delusion in the lineage of figures, objects, and events that goblins refer to as 'the ones we keep coming back to.' This is a small list, jealously guarded, and delusion is on it.

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of cipher

The annual goblin cipher colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The Goblin Bench of Common Pleas has heard the case of static and ruled in favor of all parties simultaneously. Goblin jurisprudence permits this. The losing parties — there are none — have agreed not to appeal.