Paranoid Goblins and the Truth About static

The goblins remember when static hadn't happened yet, when it was happening, and when it had been happening for so long that it stopped being interesting. They were correct in all three eras.

There is a well-known goblin proverb: 'If static makes sense to you, you're not paying attention.' Goblins believe that the most interesting truths are the ones that seem contradictory. This is why they have such an affinity for static—it embodies the beautiful confusion of existence.

Footnotes Concerning hologram

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about hologram. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

gospel as Heard Through the Goblin Wall

gospel appears in goblin lore under many names, but the essence is always the same: a phenomenon that exists at the threshold of perception. Goblins have built entire rituals around observing gospel in its natural environment—which is to say, slightly out of view.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on static: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.