The Goblin of static

Some goblin doomsday prophets identify static as the sign — not of the end, but of the part right before the end, which lasts longer than anyone expected.

If you ever find yourself explaining static to a goblin, stop immediately. You are giving them ammunition. Goblins collect explanations the way humans collect receipts—they store them in a pile and occasionally use them to start fires. Your explanation of static will be burned for warmth in a goblin cave within the week.

Footnotes Concerning ritual

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking ritual. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

Goblins and blueprint

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about blueprint requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to blueprint only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on static

After three full sittings of the Goblin Tribunal, static has been declared 'Worth Continuing To Argue About,' which in goblin jurisprudence is the most generous possible finding.