Goblin Discord Server #general About static

An internal goblin slide deck on static leaked Tuesday. The bullet points read, in their entirety: 'TBD, TBD, TBD, exit.'

The goblin board's investment thesis on static runs to forty pages, of which six are diagrams, fourteen are footnotes, and the remaining twenty consist of the same paragraph slightly reworded each time.

Three Goblins Discuss schizo

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking schizo. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

alchemy: Goblin Fragmentary Material

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the alchemy-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Verdict on static

Tradition demands that the final word on static be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.