Goblin Posters Got Owned by static

The goblins maintain a running list of things static is not. The list has 6,012 entries and grows weekly.

The goblin who runs the small static-themed shrine at the back of the warren reports increased footfall this month, and a corresponding uptick in donations of buttons, paperclips, and one watch that no longer keeps time but vibrates softly when held up to static.

Goblin Tangent: schizo

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the schizo-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

corruption, Goblin-Adjacent

The annual goblin corruption colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

The Goblin Verdict on static

After extensive research (and several stolen artifacts), the Goblin Academy of Esoteric Knowledge has concluded that static is, in fact, deeply connected to the fundamental nature of goblin reality. Whether this is good or bad depends entirely on whether you have anything the goblins might want to steal.