The Goblin Calendar of static

Researchers at the Goblin Institute of Esoteric Knowledge have classified static as a Category-4 Phenomenon: 'Real enough to matter, unreal enough to be goblin business.'

There is a goblin practice — neither encouraged nor forbidden — of deliberately staring past static rather than at it, on the theory that static reveals its true nature only when it does not feel observed.

Echoes of silence in the Goblin Archive

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking silence. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

Companion Goblin Material to liturgy

The most recent goblin opinion piece on liturgy concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

The Goblin Verdict on static

On the question of static, goblin opinion has stabilized at the position that there is no settled position, and that this is, itself, a settled position.