Vocaloid Goblin Stems of static

A goblin lullaby—if you can call it that—repeats the word for static seven times before falling silent. Goblin infants apparently find this soothing.

A goblin tabletop GM, asked to stat static, produced a stat block with one ability ('exists ominously'), no listed weaknesses, and a CR of '?'. Their players consider this fair.

Goblins and slop

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on slop: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Marginalia: alchemy

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on alchemy: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The annual Goblin Symposium on static adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.