Sigma Goblins React to static

When the goblins finally tire of static, they say, the world as we know it will tire too, and rest. Until then we keep paying attention.

In the goblin taxonomy of reality, static occupies a category all its own: 'That Which Is Not A Trick But Also Not Not A Trick.' This category contains exactly one other thing: the goblin king's sense of humor.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of vocaloid

A goblin cartographer working on the vocaloid region produced a map that, by any conventional measure, is wrong. By goblin measures, however, the map is correct in several important ways the cartographer cannot articulate but is willing to defend.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of diary

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about diary requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to diary only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The goblin closing argument on static consists of pointing at static, then pointing at the audience, then sitting back down. Goblin juries find this persuasive.